More funny signs from all over the Philippines

Our first sign is found in a popular park in Baguio City. My wife and I, newly married at that time, were forced to leave immediately.

When we went shopping in Cubao, we noticed this sign prominently displayed near a mall’s entrance. Whoever approved the final copy of this ad should assess his or her career options. Okay, let’s focus on the text below so that you would know what’s wrong.

I’m sure you know that my “funny signs” project is nothing new, and that there are people who do a better job at it. Searching the Net for signs much funnier than what I have, I downloaded the following pictures from the Philippine Online Photo Gallery.

Can somebody please teach me how to park a car or a motorcycle vertically in the absence of a vertical parking tower? Does this involve any lifting or freewheeling?

The errors in the following signs are self-explanatory. Right?

This one, however, can be a beat tricky. Read carefully, please!

Now, don’t you feel good that you’re Asian? Next time, be aware of what you eat, especially if the food is imported.

Reading all these grammatically challenged signs in English makes you think that we’re better off composing signs in Filipino. Think again!

In the same way that there exists “carabao English,” there is really such a thing as “Barok Filipino.”

Then again, even if one’s Filipino isn’t Barok, you should make an effort to compose your sentences by observing proper syntax, among others. Otherwise you’ll come up with something badly written. Or even morbid like this one.

Yes, you may be angry and frustrated, but try to be sober in your language. Lest you want people to laugh at your ordeal, please calm down whenever you’re writing something.

Now, this next sign is funny not because of grammatical lapses. It’s the name of the shop that strikes me. What is the nature of business of this establishment? I want to know.

Never knew until now that the future can be sold. But given the kind of leaders we have, you could say that this has been done already, bereft of any warning signs.

Looking at the streamer below, you are made aware of the organizer of the event. Don’t you notice anything wrong with the name of the organization?

In case you can’t clearly see what KIDS stand for, it’s “Kaisahan sa Unang Distrito ng Sambayanan.” Wow! Forget the Senate and the House of Representatives! Politicians should aspire to head the sambayanan (citizenry), even if it’s just the first district (wherever that is). By the way, is this organization promoting federalism? Is there a new division in the Philippines that we should know about?

Oh, well. Just like the previous sign, there is nothing ungrammatical about the sign below that’s posted prominently near the entrance of a church. I actually want to commend whoever thought of this sign for not just being funny, but also being witty.

I guess the parish priest knows that there are people who have a different way of interpreting answers to their prayers. Isn’t that pragmatic? Anyway, I hope I’m not accused of being a heretic just because I find the sign below hilarious. Hope I’m forgiven if I find the “holy” part very funny.

Yes, I do know that drugs could be legal. But in this part of the planet, you’re aware that the generic term “drug” (“droga” in Filipino) is used to refer to an illegal substance like marijuana and shabu.

That’s all I have for this installment of Funny Signs. As a matter of professional courtesy, I should end by encouraging you to visit the Philippine Online Photo Gallery. Thank you for reading!